Who Did It?

What we have here are the cats' food and water dishes. In the water dish is a drowned toy mouse. This is a frequent occurence at our home. I'm not sure which one it is, but one of them insists on drowning the toy mice. One of them (Gracie) also insists on eating like a pig and backwashing food into the water dish.

Suspect #1 - Grace Marie. (Yes, they have middle names. They needed middle names as kittens because they were getting in trouble ALL the time.) AKA Gracie. AKA the cat who can turn anyone into a cat lover. AKA Juli's cat. This is an awful mugshot of her.

Suspect #2 - Sabrina Louise. AKA Beener. AKA the snottiest cat around. AKA Chuck's cat. She is a beauty, but has little to no personality. In this mugshot she appears surprised to be a suspect.

So, who did it??

November Photos, Finally!

Samuel is on the left and Noah is on the right.

Dumbfounded

Dumbfounded is a good word for how I feel about our adoption lately.

It is completely unbelievable to me that it is November 26th, 2007 and our boys are still not home. It shocks me and angers me. Never in a million years did I think we'd wait this long for our boys to come home.

Few things in life have been this utterly shocking to me. About the only thing that I can compare it to is how I felt for months after miscarrying. I just could not believe that had happened to me. Sure, I had been through it. I remembered the ultrasound, the doctor's words, the surgery, but how on earth did that happen to me??

Well, that's how I feel about this long wait. Yeah, I've been waiting all this time, but suddenly I'm just completely flabbergasted that this is my reality. Like, how did this sneak up on me? I feel almost like I've been assaulted. It is surreal, yet it is the truth. We will spend another Christmas without them. We missed their birthday. They are two and we have lost those first two years that are so essential when it comes to bonding and attachment. It makes me so mad.

I truly believe that if it weren't for my relationship with God that I would have lost it a long time ago. People tell me all the time how patient I am. Well, it's forced patience. What else can I do besides wait? I try to keep a good attitude because that is what God would have me do in this. But some days just stink.

Yes, I would do this all over again, in case you are wondering. It has been hard, but it has also been filled with joy and excitement. It's been a path of getting to know God more deeply and seeing Him provide for our needs in truly miraculous ways. It's been more good than bad.

But I'm still dumbfounded.

Quiet

All is quiet here at my sister's house. Christi and her husband Jeremy and Chuck are all sleeping. We all planned to go shopping early this morning, but we forgot to go to sleep beforehand. So, at 1:15 a.m. I decided not to go shopping. I need my sleep and I was no longer pleasant to be around. That is an understatement. The crazy threesome left the house at 1:15 a.m. so they could partake in some awesome deals. They were all home by 11 a.m. and have been sleeping for a few hours now.

This has given me some time alone that I hadn't anticipated on this trip. So far I've done my Bible Study, researched a free airline ticket that Chuck got, looked on Craig's List for a job, and researched going back to college. I'm not too far away from a degree in English and I'm thinking of taking a class in January. I know that it is quite some time before the boys come home (passports are taking 4 months and we aren't even there yet), and I'm tired of wasting time waiting for them to come home.

Forgive me if that sounded wrong. I'll explain. In many ways, our lives (me and Chuck's) have been on hold for two years because of the adoption. Every decision, every purchase, everything is weighed against "when the boys come home." I have been unemployed for nearly a year because I'm staying home with the boys and we knew it would be wise to put some time between my fast paced work and being at home with two toddlers. We knew I needed a chance to slow down. Well, if I slow down much more I won't be moving! The same holds true for finishing my degree. Three semesters have passed and each time I said I didn't want to sign up for a class and then have the boys come home in the middle of it. Well... I'm tired of doing nothing as I wait. I'm a "do stuff" kind of gal.

Now I know some of you who are reading are thinking I'm crazy because Chuck and I have had a whirlwind year as he retired from the Coast Guard, went into ministry, we went to Haiti (Chuck once and me 3 times), we sold and bought a house AND moved; and yes we are 99% unpacked. Those of you who know me well know that I stay pretty busy doing stuff. But, I have goals in life that have been on pause (and will definitely stay on pause in the early years of having kids) because I thought our kids were coming home.

So, I'm researching things and praying that God will lead me in what He will have me do. I hate school, but I want to finish my degree. I would love to make some extra income and potentially buy a minivan with it. God will have to lead me to His plan in all of this. If He wants to keep me on pause, so be it.

a lil' bit of everything

First and foremost: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, MOM!!!!!!!!! This is the first birthday I've been able to spend with my mom in years. Chuck and I drove to MI yesterday to be here for her birthday and Thanksgiving.

Secondly, Happy Thanksgiving! We have so very much to be thankful for. In case you're reading this and just not feeling it, I encourage you to think hard about this, especially if you live in the US. I have met some of the poorest people in the world and I have found them to be ever thankful. It's not about what or who you have. If your hope is in Jesus, you have eternity to be thankful for. If your hope is not in Jesus and you want to know more, please email me at ittybitties@msn.com. I'd love to talk to you about that.

It's been a week since I've posted because I've been beyond busy. I'd like to share some highlights from our week, though. On Sunday we had a BBQ for the people who helped get our church campus started. What we thought would be 20-30 people was actually 74 people. It was awesome. We had so much fun. Thank you to all of you who came out on Sunday. We appreciate you and the sacrifices you are making so much. Lives are being changed for eternity because of you. Chuck and I love you all!!

I have to take a moment and just share how thankful I am for our new home. The weeks leading up to our move were torturous because we weren't sure if our old house was ever going to close. I barely remember it, though. We are so happy in our new house that the weeks leading up to it are a dim memory. I've been told it will be this way with the adoption. All the pain of waiting supposedly becomes forgotten. Back to the house. We NEVER EVER could have hosted a shindig such as the one we had Sunday at our old house. Never. Now, don't get me wrong - it was crazy at our house with all those people (nearly half of whom were kids), but it was manageable. We are so thankful for our house. Did I say that already? God has been so amazingly good to us.

Tuesday I got to spend a good part of the day with a great friend. It was so nice to hang out and relax with her. We had plans to organize her apartment, but quickly decided that a relaxing lunch and some light shopping would be a better way to spend the day. It was great and just what I needed. Thank you, Nicole, for being my friend. I love you!

Tabitha is on the mend and was discharged yesterday from the hospital as planned. Please keep her in prayer as her hip continues to heal. Please pray especially for her family and even more specifically for her baby son, Hayden. It's never easy when the mommy is out of commission.

In adoption news: There is none. We now get our pictures mid month and our updates at the end of the month. Pictures are going to be late this month, so I'll post them once we get them. Our update should come on 11/30. Please join us in praying that our update this month is that we are out of 2nd Legalization and that they have our adoption decree. In fact, you can pray that they email us a scanned copy of the adoption decree. After all that happened with miscommunications about where our paperwork was at, it would really build trust if we had a copy of our adoption decree.

I think that's all. I wish you the best this Thanksgiving!

Surgery Update

I heard from Tabitha's husband a little while ago that surgery went well. Actually, it went better than well. The surgeon was sure he was going to have to break Tabitha's femur to do the replacement, but he didn't have to do that. That is awesome!! This significantly cuts down on her recovery time. God is so good. Thank you for praying!

Please Pray for Tabitha

My good friend, Tabitha, is having major surgery Thursday morning. She's only 28, but needs a new hip. She goes in for hip replacement surgery first thing in the morning. Please pray for her, and also for her family. She has 3 boys - 8, 6 and 16 months. Her husband, Chris, is going to have his hands full. Please join me in praying that they are surrounded with loving, helpful people in the weeks to come as Tabitha recovers and that God comforts her kids when she is unavailable to them. Thanks!

Christmas Presents

The boys will be in Haiti for Christmas again. It breaks my heart, but there's not anything I can do about it.

Our orphanage gives us a list of specific items to purchase for our kids for Christmas. This year, as toddlers, they will receive:

An Outfit

Sandals

Underwear (no, they are not yet potty trained)

Toothbrush

Toothpaste

Beach Ball (they love them)

Construction Vehicle (soft and makes noise)

Also pictured are engravable ornaments that will not be sent to Haiti. This is a tradition we began last year for the boys.

I sent our gifts today to someone who will be traveling to Haiti soon. We will probably get pictures of the kids with their gifts at Christmas.

I'm not at all ready for Christmas. It was just 100 degrees. How on earth is it already time for Christmas??

Birthday Cake

On Friday I made a cake for the boys. We decorated it on Saturday and video taped ourselves singing happy birthday to the boys. It was sad of course, but not as bad as I expected. We had a lot of people praying for us and I know that made all the difference. Thank you to all our dear family and friends who prayed for us on Friday.

Two

Today, two is an important number.

Two years ago yesterday was the due date of a baby that I miscarried.

Two years ago yesterday we got news that our adoption application was approved and we would be adopting from Haiti.

Two years ago today I prayed very early in the morning and thanked God for getting me through the due date day. It was during that prayer that I realized something. Here is an excerpt from my prayer journal that morning:

What an amazing day yesterday! I had been so afraid of November 8th and I didn't even shed a tear. There was just overflowing joy and excitement about our adoption. Also, I had a thought this morning. I've told You that I expected to be pregnant by November 8th and I realized that our baby is in the womb right now - more than likely! That isn't ironic - that's You. Thank You. So please be with our baby and his or her mom.

Two years ago today our precious sons were born and I was praying for them as they were being born. What a gift that is. They were born at home, and their family wasn't expecting two babies. Two years ago today their birthmom passed away. Two years ago today thier birthfather, in great mourning, began to care for his two sons on his own because he had no family to help him. For a little over two months he took care of them before realizing he couldn't do it on his own.

Two. It's an important number today.

I have two competing emotions today. Happiness and sadness. Happiness because I can look back and so clearly see the hand of God. Happiness because our boys have made it to two years old in a country where a lot of babies don't make it to two. And I have sadness. Sadness that they are spending their birthday in an orphanage. Sadness because they have no idea that it's their birthday or what a birthday is. Sadness because they won't be wearing party hats or blowing out candles. I also have sadness for their birthfather. Today marks two years since he lost his wife. I can't imagine how hard today is for him.

Two. No child should have to spend their 2nd birthday, or any birthday for that matter, in an orphanage.

Two.

Happy Birthday, Noah Elise and Samuel Eli. I'm so sorry we're not together.

For Christi

Living Room

Living Room

Kitchen

Dining Room

My darling sister, Christi, has been bugging me for days for pictures. These are just a few. It's too cold to go out and take outdoor pictures and the bedrooms and office aren't quite ready for the worldwide web.

Progress

We are getting there. All the kitchen, living room, and office boxes are officially unpacked. Not everything is where it should be since I'm not sure where to put everything. The boys' room hasn't been touched yet and there are a lot of furniture boxes that I'm banishing to the screened porch to be broken down on a later date. We aren't using the attic here since we have so much storage space in the garage and shed, however the shed needs a new roof before we put stuff in there. That means the garage will remain overcrowded until that project is completed.

There will be no pictures hanging on the walls tonight unless Chuck does it. He is our interior designer and he's not sure where he wants things.

I'll leave you with a funny story. First of all I need to confess that I've watched Saw 1,2, & 3 all within the last 2 weeks. I'm not into gore and horror, but I was told there are some good twists in these movies and I'm a sucker for a good twist. I'm here to tell you that the twists aren't worth the gore at all. Those movies are awful. Anyway, I'm digressing. I've told you about the Saw movies so you'll understand that I'm a little on edge. I'm not a scardey cat usually, but lately I'm just on edge. Well, we are new to the garage thing. We've never had one before and ours is attached. Yesterday I left the house for about 3 hours and totally forgot to close the garage door. I realized it halfway into my trip out, and I was quite a ways from home by then. More than anything I was afraid someone was going to steal the riding lawnmower in the garage. When I got home and saw that everything was in the garage as it should be, I realized that someone could be waiting in my house with some crazy gadget and a test (you'll need to see a Saw movie to understand that) for me. So, I did the smart thing and entered the house and grabbed the biggest kitchen knife we have and did a thorough check of the house. I felt a little silly after the fact. So, the big lesson learned: Close the garage door!

Still Unpacking...

Just an update - we're still unpacking. Our friends Dana and Samantha came over yesterday and were such a huge help in getting our kitchen unpacked. Thank you so much, Dana and Samantha!!! You two rock!! They also helped us build our dining room set and a plastic cupboard for the garage.

The boxes are slowly dwindling away. Our room is pretty much unpacked. I just unpacked the linen closet. We need to build a new shelf unit before the office can be completed. There's a lot of miscellaneous stuff that I'm not sure where to put. We are also new to the whole garage thing, so there are many items that will go in there. Right now the garage is a wreck with one narrow path.

Tomorrow night we are having our Gel Group (small group) meet here, so progress is necessary. I'm hoping to even have pictures hanging on the walls by then. We'll see.

My sister keeps begging for pictures. The camera has been located, however I can't take pictures yet. I'm a little too vain to post pictures of my house in this condition on the internet. Soon, Christi, soon.

Oh yeah, one more thing - we have a home phone number again. If you want it, please email me at ittybitties@msn.com. We'd prefer to get more calls on the home phone since we've gone over in cell phone minutes two months in a row.

That's all for now. The boxes are calling.

We Moved!

This is just a quick post to share that we have moved! It all FINALLY came together late Thursday and we were able to close. We've handed over the keys to the old place and we will be unpacking fools this weekend.

Thank you, thank you, thank you for all your prayers!

Great Adoption News

We got our monthly update late last night.

We have Judgment - yeah! The next step in the process is 2nd Legalization. Please join us in praying that we receive this quickly. Once 2nd Legalization is complete the adoption decree gets drawn up and that is the document that makes the boys legally ours in Haiti (here, too, but they need passports to get here).

YEAH!!