I'm thinking that I'm not going to blog during the month of February. I need a break. I realize that I don't blog super frequently - that I take lots of breaks - but they are with guilt. If I tell you I'm not blogging this month, if I tell myself, then I won't feel guilty about it.
I live pretty transparently here on the ole blog, but I don't share everything. Some things are just not meant for the world wide web. I have a whole lot of unsharable stuff going on right now - lost friendships, family stuff, medical stuff, drama, etc. A lot of sadness. A lot of loss. And while I could just post the happy stuff, it seems untruthful and shallow to do that with how I'm feeling about much of my life.
Plus I'm trying to reconcile the idea of, "I don't need to talk to you. I just read your blog." I've had a few people tell me that. I'm not okay with that. I need to put some thought into the purpose of this blog, what I share here, and whether or not I want to continue. I may have "blog friends," but I need tangible fellowship with my friends, too. I read a lot of peoples' blogs, but I wouldn't call all of them my friends. So why do I do that? Am I just being nosy? Am I interested in their lives? Do I truly care about them? These are all some of the questions I'm going to think about this month.
So, I should be back in March. Maybe before, maybe not. I just don't know.
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5 comments:
Julie,
I think you bring up so many good points. The Web is wonderful but one of its drawbacks is how it allows us to superficially care of people. And blogging is also great but I also think that at its worst, it serves as a place for emotional vomiting disguised as transparency or as a place for popularity contests based on who has the most followers or as a place for wow~look at my life type thinking. I'm sorry you're at a rough spot right now. You've had so much change in the last 6 months. And then add "normal" life events into the mix. I pray you find some peace about life. I pray you will continually be at rest in God's providence in the midst of loss. We've had some doozy losses this year; be assured of God's faithfulness even in the middle of your chaos. I believe He will work for good what was intended for evil.
Praying for you, Juli.
Hi Juli,
I agree with a lot of what Kayla said. Most of the things you are feeling are things I was struggling with when I took my blog break last summer.
Honestly, it really helped me to understand why I enjoy blogging and I began to enjoy it and even, dare I say, miss it. :)
I'll be praying also for your heart during this time, and for God to surround you with "real-life" people who love you and can minister to you.
I used to be one of your real live friends, but became obsolete. I will miss hearing about your family and knowing what specifically to pray for. I hope your trouble decreases and your joy increases.
Aww. I so understand.
Please e-mail me or call me. I don't just want to be blog friends.
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