I knew my post yesterday would ruffle some feathers. Honestly, I wanted it to. I really hoped it would make people take a look at what is driving their views on Madonna's situation. The smug cheers of people over this situation turn my stomach.
It's not my desire to debate this issue, because I have no desire to change my mind on this. I respect the thoughts and opinions of others, so I will post all comments on this. But I'm not going to debate this.
I purposefully didn't comment on the legal aspects, but I do have some thoughts on that as well that I will share.
Luke 16: 1-18 is the Parable of the Shrewd Manager and it is what drives my opinion. The take away that I pull from this parable is to use our worldy influence and wealth to impact eternity. That is what I see Madonna and Angelina Jolie and any other celebrity with a fast-tracked adoption doing. From this perspective, I don't care what the law says. If they are able to use their wealth and position to give an orphan a home, I don't care that they don't have to go through the same process as everyone else. No, it's not fair. But there is no promise in the Bible that I can find that says life will be fair.
Overall, it's about what's driving our heart as we look at this situation.
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3 comments:
Juli (and Chuck-I had to go back and read the comments so I know Chuch weighed in on this too),
You have an interesting perspecive, one that I really hadn't considered. That's mostly because I'm a follow the rules kind of gal and it's hard for me to see breaking or bending the rules as okay, even if the ulterior motive is good. I think you have definitely hit some goods points. The people who are literally rejoicing over Madonna's rejection make me terribly sad. People who find joy in others pain, even if that pain is self induced, are hard for me to understand. And I do think we have to get over the "I want it to be fair" business. Adoption unfortunately produces a feeling of even one day sooner would be great and thus creates an odd competitive, comparative situation between families. I've been there; I literally cried for days when we were at the end of the process and people who got out of MOI after us were bringing there kids home before us.
But I do wonder about how such high profile adoptions and skirting of the country's adoption laws affect future adoptions in all countries. I try not to buy into conspiracy theories if I can help it but it does seem that several organizations including UNICEF believe that international adoption should only be used as a last resort, when all efforts to keep the child in country have failed. That view is not realistic in 3rd world countries; it's like trying to use a post it note as a band aid on a gaping wound. There are simply not the financial or people resources in those countries to support the large number of starving and abandoned children. That said, instances like Madonna's supposed attempt at circumventing the law provides ammunition for those who hold such views. In their mind, international adoption leads to corruption, rule breaking, bribery, and other destabilizing problems within already fragile governments. And if adoptions are hurriedly finalized without enough time for the correct research to be done, it could lead to families having their children adopted without knowledge or consent. (I personally think most adoptions take way too long and that more than enough time has gone by to ensure that families are notified and understand what is about to happen to their child but in this case we don't know how long this child's case was pending.) I'm not saying we should lay prostrate before such organizations and let them dictate adoption protocol. Just that it does matter how high profile (and other) adoptions are completed. Mind you, I also think it matters to little Mercy if she is left to fend for herself in Malawi because her government and various groups like Ethica and UNICEF have failed her by blocking her adoption.
My biggest thoughts on this whole deal are why was Madonna's adoption pinpointed? Simply because she was famous or because she tried to get around the law? And if it was because she tried to side step the law then why should her whole adoption be halted? Shouldn't she just have to go back and follow the law in order to adopt Mercy? Is she unwilling to do this? Or is the government because of pressure from other organizations unwilling to allow her the opportunity to go back?
Kayla,
I just love your mile-long comments! :)
Interestingly, I am also a rule following girl. It makes Chuck crazy.
I think you know our adoption journey well enough to know that many kids went home before our kids who had been in process for a signigicantly shorter time. I shed many tears as well.
I agree with you wholeheartedly about your post it note theory. We just can't apply Americanized ideas in a third world country. You explain it so well.
We know that in order for Madonna to adopt Mercy James, some laws are going to have to be bent according to current Malawi laws. But this is nothing new. Haitian law says that my family was ineligible to adopt, yet they approved us. And many more families are also "circumventing" that law. See, if it goes through the courts and a judgment is made, then the celebrity isn't really breaking the law. Yes, I'm sure her status helps the decision to be made, but really - does it matter when it comes to the good of the child. And I will continue to go back to that argument.
When it comes to groups like UNICEF and Ethica - well, they are losing face daily by their ignorant views that they continue to publicize. Recently Vera at http://www.achildsvoiceinternational.blogspot.com/ commented on UNICEF's fancy SUV's and that they don't have the resources to help people in rural areas of Haiti. Ethica called themselves to question before the largest Yahoo group for people adopting from Haiti. I doubt that they will continue to have the influence that they've had in the past as they continue to make these types of PR blunders.
I'm sure we aren't hearing all of the Madonna story. I certainly hope that if her heart is true, that she will be able to adopt Mercy. Thanks for sharing your thoughts, Kayla. Oh, and by the way, I love to read about how Kenson is adjusting. I totally envy you in the potty training department!!
Juli
I listened to an internet radio program yesterday on "corruption and international adoption" and thought it was pretty well presented with all sides represented. I liked when the person who was more pro-adoption said "we can have a zero tolerance policy for corruption" but we need to have a "zero tolerance policy for orphans." Here's the link if you ever get a chance...
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/creatingafamily/2009/04/01/Corruption-in-International-Adoption
Miss you all - see you next week, I hope.
Terri
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