Prayers for Friends

Update: Little Chloe Elise was born last night at 8:36 p.m. Mom and baby are both doing well. Thanks for praying for them!


If you could, please say a pray for Carrie and Jason today.

Carrie is pregnant and being induced, so hopefully they will have a baby very soon!

Induction is definitely not something I'd want, so I'm saying a special prayer that it goes really well for her.

Thanks!

Well, it's been a while...

Wow, it's been a long time since I've posted. Sorry about that.I've entered the dreaded third trimester since my last post. All was well until last weekend. I don't think I did anything other than grow bigger, but it apparently put some bad strain on my lower back. I was pretty miserable Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. It also feels as though someone is doing something horrible to my hips. This last week has been one full of aching and whining.There has been good stuff, too. So far I've gained 2o lbs and my doctors are happy about that. I really thought I'd be one of those people who pack on the pounds pregnant. I guess I am not (so far anyway). Don't get me wrong - I'm fat, but I started out that way. It wasn't brought on by pregnancy. Also, I had the glucose test done again at 27 weeks and passed. So, no gestational diabetes for me! I've also not had much swelling yet. I have near cankles right now, but not full blown cankles and they will go down as soon as I put my feet up.Tristan is still moving around a lot, but it feels very different now. Kind of like he's running out of space. Rather than the flips and jumps he was doing a few weeks ago, he now seems to drag body parts across my uterus. I still get kicked, too. I'm still sleeping pretty well, for the most part. I'm not at all looking forward to diminished sleep. That's all that's new in my pregnant world. I'll try to post a little more frequently.

Tagged

I got tagged a couple of days ago for this questionaire. Of course I procrastinated (see bad habit question...). I was tagged by Chapter 2 Manmi. She and her husband recently brought their three children home from Haiti after a very looooong wait. Their story gives me hope that our boys really will come home.

1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.

2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.

3. At the end of the post, the player then tags five people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves them a comment, letting them know they’ve been tagged and asking them to read the player’s blog.

4. Let the person who tagged you know when you’ve posted your answer.

What were you doing 5 years ago?
At the end of May 2003 Chuck and I were moving from one apartment in Virginia Beach to another. I was still enrolled in college, just beginning the summer semester, which was grueling. Chuck and I began marriage counseling that month as well and it literally saved our marriage. Our marriage counselor then is still a friend today and we totally give him and God all the credit that we are still married and happy.

What are 5 things on your to-do list for today?
Meet with my friend Nicole. Meet with my friend Amanda. Go to a doctor's appointment. Look into some classes. Have dinner with family.

What are 5 snacks you enjoy?
Tortilla chips and Queso. Icecream. Really good milk chocolate. Sour patch kids. Spinach Dip.

What 5 things would you do if you were a billionaire?
Move us into a slightly bigger house in a slightly better school district. Give all my family some money so they could live comfortably and not have to worry about retirement. Get involved with some reputable organizations in Haiti. Give more in all areas of my life. Travel a lot.

What are 5 of your bad habits?
Being late. Procrastination. Hitting the snooze button. Leaving hangers on the bedroom door handle (this drives Chuck crazy, mainly because it gives the cats something to make noise with). Peeling my nails.

What are 5 places you have lived?
Skandia, MI. Redford, MI. Dearborn Heights, MI. Morehead City, NC. Portsmouth, VA.

What are 5 jobs you have had?
McDonald's. Sub and salad maker at a pizzeria. Bank teller. Server. Administrative Assistant.

What 5 people do you want to tag?
Here's where I break the rules. If you are reading this and haven't done this one yet, go do it!

Thanks, Chapter 2 Manmi, for inviting me to participate!

Praise the Lord X2!

Today was a day of good news!

This afternoon I was able to confirm that the USCIS office in Port au Prince has received our updated fingerprints from the National Visa Center. Yeah!! Now, we need to get the boys home before August 23rd or we will have to redo the fingerprints. Redoing the fingerprints is not hard (but it does cost money). Getting it communicated to Haiti seems to be the hard part.

I also received an update today that our long form at MOI has been filled out. I really don't know how much longer to expect to be in MOI now that the long form is filled out, but at least we are moving along.

Oh, happy day!

Expired Puffs

When I was in Haiti last August a nightmare came true. My luggage didn't make it. I arrived on Monday and my luggage arrived late Thursday. I went home Friday. I truly learned how God provides on that trip! People were so generous.

Well, on Thursday night when I got my luggage I began distributing diapers and wipes and food items that I had brought for the boys, but didn't get to use. Among those items was a container of strawberry apple puffs. If you have toddlers, you probably know what I'm talking about. If not, it's a toddler food put out by Gerber. My boys love them.

Well, that night I was able to give everything away but the puffs. No one wanted them. As I sat at the dinner table with our group, I looked at the expiration date and exclaimed that surely our boys would be home before April 30, 2008 to eat them. The strangest thing happened then. The director of the orphanage heard what I said, looked at me, but made no comment. It struck me as odd then and I wonder now; did she know? Did she know they wouldn't come home by that date? I don't know. I certainly never imagined that my boys would still be in Haiti 9 months later. At that time we were supposedly awaiting judgment, but the following month we learned that we had never exited Parquet as we'd been told months earlier.

As I got ready to toss these puffs in the trash (as I've done with lots of other food) I remembered how certain I was that my boys would be home to eat them and they are not. Sometimes I just can't fathom that this is reality.

As I spent time quietly with God today I was reminded that my eyes need to stay focused on Him. It is easy for my eyes to wander toward the evil that surrounds this adoption. I sometimes stare it in the face and wonder how it is so. I become obsessed by it with such a strong desire to set right the wrongs. But the Lord has quietly shown me that it is His job to bring justice. And He will. We all have to account for our sins. Judgment day is real. I will have to face the Lord for the things I've done and so will those who have had a hand in the evil surrounding our adoption, whoever they are. God has allowed it, but He will deliver justice. So, tonight I choose to keep my eyes focused on Him. I will throw away the puffs and with it my anger and desire to focus on the evil.

May Photos and Updates

Elie (Samuel) is 32.75in. He sucks continually on his thumb. He talks but not clear enough to be understood. He is a very happy boy, outgoing and independent. He loves his brother dearly.

Elisée (Noah) sucks on his second finger. He hangs out with his brother more than he does with the others. He always intends to be escaping the nannies by going on the other side of the room. He is 33in.

'

Getting monthly update photos is always thrilling and sad at the same time. I love to see their little faces, but I hate to see them growing up more and more each month. This month we also got a quarterly update. If they looked a little more closely they'd see that Samuel wraps his thumb around his first finger and sucks on both. I often wonder if they hang out with each other and it does my heart good to hear that they love to be with one another.

'

Oh Lord, soon, please?

Two Years Ago Today

Two years ago today Chuck and I celebrated the arrival of our dossier (adoption paperwork) in Haiti. The timeline then was 8-15 months. We naively hoped for Christmas.

It had taken us 6 months to compile the dossier and we had committed to the boys in January, 4 months earlier. In case you're not into math, we started our paperwork 30 months ago, committed to the boys 28 months ago, and sent our dossier to Haiti 24 months ago.

My, oh my, what a long time ago that all was.

From my estimation, our best case scenario (unless, of course, God does something miraculous) is mid-August. I've gotten to the point that when people ask how much longer I don't even give them best case/worst case scenarios anymore.

Rather depressing, isn't it?

Yesterday...

First of all, thank you for the sweet comments left on my blog. You all inspire me and lift me up. (Well, most of you anyway. Some comments just don't get published and that's the truth.)

Anyway, yesterday was great! Church was good. Tear down (remember, we meet in a high school) was quick. We took Chuck's parents out to lunch at Chili's and I got to have one of my favorite salads. This is the first Mother's Day in years that we've actually spent with one of our Moms.

Chuck got me flowers and a new Dustbuster (I asked for it, really! And I'm super excited about it, too.) (My old one was literally taped together.) and an iTunes gift card.

I took a looooooooooong nap. It was rainy yesterday so it was perfect napping weather. Gracie, my favorite cat, totally snuggled with me for the entire nap. Even when I woke up she wasn't ready to quit snuggling. I love that!

And best of all - the Survivor season finale was on last night. I'm still in shock that Parvati won.

All in all, it was a great day. Not once was I sucked into self pity. Yay!

Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day to my mom and Chuck's mom and to all the moms out there that I know.

I pray that today was a wonderful day for you!

And for those of us waiting moms, I pray that you were blessed in a special way today and that this is the last Mother's Day you spend waiting.

Love,
Juli

A Mother's Love...

Mother's Day 2005 was hard for me because I had miscarried a month before.
Mother's Day 2006 was hard because we had committed to Noah and Samuel.
Mother's Day 2007 was rough because I never imagined my boys wouldn't be home by then.
As Mother's Day 2008 approaches, my thoughts swirl. This is what a mother's love is according to me, a mom whose waited far too long.

A Mother's Love...
...prays for her kids in an orphanage
...prays for her arms to supernaturally hold her kids and that they'd feel it
...prays for God to whisper her voice in their ears
...prays for overworked and underpaid nannies to meet the needs of her boys
...smiles wide when thinking of her boys
...tears up just thinking of the day they come home
...asks tough questions
...keeps important paperwork up to date
...spends a day tracking down her home study provider
...empties the closet of clothing the boys have outgrown (repeatedly)
...makes the beds, even though she knows they will get dusty and need to be redone
...buys food on sale and then gives it away when it is close to expiring
...buys diapers and gives them away when they are outgrown
...devotes a cupboard to kids dishes that go unused
...continues to encourage friends and family when they are discouraged about the adoption
...quietly listens when some friends and family give up on the kids ever coming home
...prays in the middle of the night when she can't sleep and wonders if her boys are okay
...seeks out the best doctors for her kids
...reads book after book and attends seminar after seminar
...sometimes needs to stay in bed for the day instead of face the world
...calls the National Visa Center and the USCIS in Haiti repeatedly trying to confirm receipt of fingerprints
...washes, folds, and hangs new clothing, praying that they won't be outgrown before they are worn
...checks email diligently
...reads blogs of other adoptive families
...learns to seek the Lord like never before

It's my hope that some of these things will be a distant memory next Mother's Day. And I hope some will be even stronger.

I pray that tomorrow will be a day that I'll glorify God in the wait.

Vietnam

Chuck is spending 9 days this month in Vietnam. I won't tell you which 9 days since this is a public site. Anyway, I'd just ask that you pray for him and his team - for safe travels, good health, and that they are able to do the work they are planning to do. For Chuck specifically, please pray that he'd be able to sleep (he consistently struggles with sleep) and that this trip would be a refreshing time for him with God.

Amazingly our church has been invited by the Vietnamese government to do various projects. It has been amazing to see how God has orchestrated it all. Again, can't really share details as this is a public site.

On a completely different subject, I'd like to ask for prayer for Vietnamese adoptions. Vietnam is scheduled to close (which means we in the US can't adopt from there) in September. This used to be one of the most stable adoption programs out there. There are many families waiting to bring home children who are completely caught up in red tape by our government. I ask you to pray that the Lord would release those children to come home to their families. Chuck and I have friends from our adoption support group who are waiting. Thier son should have been home in February and they have no idea when he will come home. Please keep the Vietnam adoption program in your prayers and let's pray that God can move mountains so that it doesn't shut down in September.

Exciting Stuff

Yesterday we finally joined the 21st century and got a dishwasher. Hooray!! We actually bought the dishwasher before we moved into this house back in November, but we had to cut out cabinets to install it so we stalled for a while. Tuesday night Chuck and our friend Josh cut the cabinets out and took care of the electricity. Yesterday Chuck finished the plumbing and VOILA I never have to hand wash a dish again unless I want to.

Next on the list: Finishing work on kitchen cabinets that were cut (any takers??). Then we can start thinking about updating the bathroom. We need to remove wallpaper, paint, and replace the vanity and light fixture.

Welcome to the Neighborhood!

In just a few short hours we will get some new neighbors (as in 10-15 minutes away) - Chuck's parents!! They've been driving for nearly a week and they are finally in Virginia.

Welcome to Chesapeake, Ron and Suzy!!

Chuck and I are really excited to officially now have family that lives less than 12 hours away! In all our years of marriage we've never lived closer than a 12 hour drive to family. This is a new experience for us!

A Lonely Place

It is my goal to write this post from a graceful heart, even though my heart hurts.

In the last few weeks there have been a few areas of my life that have really brought me to a lonely place. I'm not going to be specific, so if you're looking for juicy information, it's not here.

In seeking God's face in these areas, I've come to a few realizations. One is that sometimes, but definitely not all the time, well-meaning people do and say things that hurt. They are just "looking out for me" so they tell me how it really is. I know that I have been that well-meaning person to others plenty of times.

Others choose to "preach." They put their opinions and beliefs out publicly and question why some would choose another path.

Sometimes it feels like judgment. And God has shown me that I, too, judge others. For me, it is mostly kept in my head and I am responsible to God even if those thoughts never exit my mouth.

What I've found lately is that when I don't do what "everyone else" is doing, I get lots of well-meaning comments or outright judgment. What's hard in these recent areas of my life is that I've really sought God in them and feel that He is the One leading me in the direction I'm heading.

My pride wants me to keep everyone happy so that everyone will like me. Well, the truth is not everyone likes me even when I keep them happy. I need to be more concerned with what God thinks of me than what others think of me. And while I seek to do that, I find myself in a lonely place. As I choose His path I find fewer friends who are there for me along the way.

In this moment I feel lonely and discouraged, but I do know that this will pass. There are a few friends I can draw encouragement from as I walk the path God has for me. And of course I can draw on the strength, love, and encouragement of God. I know that as I seek to follow His will that I'm choosing the best thing, no matter how hard or lonely the path is.

We Are Okay

Just a quick post to share that we are okay. We had some crazy weather on Monday that brought tornadoes very close to where we live, but not close enough to harm us or our home. Thanks to everyone who's checked in on us. Please say some prayers for the families who lost everything. A lot of people were impacted. Thankfully, no one was killed.

What is Wrong with Me??

So, it's 8:20 a.m. and I'm walking around the house in shorts and a t-shirt, with the AC on, planning to go outside to plant six new cucumber plants (yeah, I'll try not to kill this bunch...) and in my head I'm singing, "It's Beginning to Look a lot Like Christmas."

Seriously, where do I come up with this stuff? It is already 65 degrees out, and the high is 85. It does not look anything like Christmas!

And if you're wondering why the AC is on and my windows are not open, the deal is that I'm madly allergic to pollen and sleeping with the windows open this time of year equates to me waking up with a horrible headache. If you're wondering why the AC is on in general, it's because I'm horribly grouchy and mean if I wake up sweating. You don't want to deal with that. Neither does Chuck.

That's enough Saturday morning ramblings for now...

I've Been Tagged

I'm not usually a big fan of these types of things, but this one really made me think. I'm not tagging anyone, but I urge you to think through what your responses are.

I am…impatient most of the time.
I want…to be closer to God.
I have…way more than I deserve.
I wish…I knew when our boys are coming home.
I hate…when people have no sense of urgency in urgent matters.
I miss…Noah and Samuel. Terribly.
I fear…something happening to Chuck or my boys.
I feel…like I’ve been given a second chance in life.
I hear…God’s leading if I listen.
I smell…the ocean lately. It draws me to be near the water.
I crave…Arabic food.
I search…for information on Haitian adoptions.
I wonder…what Heaven will really be like.
I regret…not living my life for God sooner.
I love…my Chuck. He is the best thing that ever happened to me.
I ache…to hold my boys.
I care…too much about what others think of me.
I always…hit the snooze button. Always.
I am not…happy with my weight.
I believe…that I will spend eternity in Heaven.
I dance…rarely, since I have no rhythm.
I sing…along with music, but rarely on my own.
I cry…when I get really angry.
I don’t always…spend time with God each day and I wish that weren’t true.
I fight…more than I should.
I write…to bring clarity to the thoughts swirling in my head.
I never…wear jewelry other than my wedding band or small earrings.
I listen…to quickly. I need to take more time to process things.
I need…God. Daily.
I am happy…when I’m in Haiti.

Being Attractive

I need to start this post off with a disclaimer: Some of you will read this and agree. Some of you will read this and totally disagree. And some of you will read it and not get it. That's all okay with me. These are my thoughts and my opinions. Comments that aren't God-honoring won't be published.

So, I've had this post brewing in my mind for a while. I'm hoping I can get what's in my head and my heart out clearly.

Two Sunday's ago the sermon at church was titled, "I Don't Like Most Christians." Here's a link. It's week #4.

My mind had already been swimming with thoughts and this sermon just added to those thoughts. My number one thought in all of this is that if I'm a Christian and I want to share Christ with those around me, then the way I live my life had better be attractive to people who don't know Christ. This, of course, is hard because I must also try to live my life in accordance with the Bible. So how do these two come together?

I think there's a lot to it. First and foremost, I need to do my best to not be a hypocrite. I think all Christians fail in this, but I need to be vigilant about it. I will fail and God does forgive me, but non-Christians don't have to forgive me for it and often will stay further away from God because of it.

I need to be real, authentic, and transparent. I'm just going to lay it out there - my experience with Christians is that A LOT of them are totally fake. They act like they've got their life all together. They have cliche phrases that they use. But catch them in the privacy of their own home and it's a different story. I, too, can be guilty of this. I want to put my best foot forward and sometimes I fake it. We all just need to realize that when we find ourselves doing this, people see it. We are fooling no one, especially God whom we are accountable to.

I need to watch my mouth. I know you are expecting my to say that I need to watch what words come out. I sometimes swear when I'm angry. That is not right. But that's not all. If I'm speaking Christianese, how am I relating to the non-Christians around me. How do I sound to non-Christians? Can they even understand me? Do I realize that some of my phrases and words cause them to build up walls toward God and toward me? The same is true in email. I try to be careful in email. I don't sign my emails with "Blessings," "Bless you," "In Christ," or whatever other phrase might be available. The reason I don't is because I don't want to alienate people. I *might* sign my email that way if it is addressed to another Christian, but it's honestly not how I usually communicate so it feels foreign to me. I'm also not a big fan of Bible verse tag lines or Christian quotes at the bottom of an email. The closest I've come to doing this is that my email used to have the tag line, "God is good!" I realize that many of you who are reading this might do these things. They don't work for me. I'm not judging you, just asking you to take a look at a different perspective.

Another thing to take a look at is what we put on our cars. I'm totally guilty here. When I was a brand new Christian I ran out and got the silver Christian fish to put on the back of my car. It is still there. I'm not quite sure how to pull it off, and I wonder at this point if the paint around it has faded so much that there will still be a shadow of the fish if I can manage to get the adhesive off my car. The reason I bring this up is because I'm an awful driver. Some of you have had the experience of nearly dying while I'm driving. Chuck often says things to me like, "Juli, why did you just cut that car off?!" And my honest answer is usually, "I didn't see him." See, I don't even know when I'm being a crappy driver. But, the person I just cut off sees the fish on the back of my car and has the opportunity to hate Christianity more because of my poor driving skills. The same is true for bumper stickers. Especially those with an agenda. The ones in particular that make my heart break are those aimed at abortion. I don't believe in abortion, but I do have Christian friends who have done it. The torture that some of them live with is horrible. (And if you think they deserve that torture you can stop reading right now and not come back to this blog. They are God's children in need of a Savior just like you.) I would hate to think that my bumper sticker would cause pain for someone earnestly seeking God's forgiveness. Put yourselves in the shoes of others. Think. Pray.

One of the things I loved the most in the sermon linked above is that one of the Christians I dislike the most is myself. There is always room for improvement in my spiritual life. As Christians we don't graduate to sainthood. Walking with Jesus is a daily mission for all our lives. The great commission teaches us to share Jesus with others. I'm very blessed to be part of a church that truly reaches out to the lost. As I strive to lead a life attractive to those who don't know Jesus, I can't help but think about the things in this post. I hope you'll think about them, too.

I have so many more thoughts on this, but this post is already too long. Maybe I'll post again on this in the future. Maybe I won't. We'll see.

Garden Update

The black thumb has proven itself outdoors as well.

I killed the cucumbers. Yes, already. They've actually been dead since Friday. It took me less than a week.

In talking to my mother, who successfully grows cucumbers, I learned that I probably didn't water them enough.

I will try again.

My tomato and pepper plants are doing alright. I give God the glory on that one.

Lots of Movement

Tristan is moving around A LOT lately. I seriously think he is doing back flips in there. I read somewhere that babies are able to move around the most between weeks 24-28 because they are still small enough to get around well. None of his movements seem to "hurt." He's not kicking my ribs or anything like that. He does sometimes seem to jump on my bladder. I'll think to myself, "I will need to use the restroom in a little while" and then he'll jump on my bladder and I'll need to go NOW.I'm excited that tomorrow we reach the 25 week mark. Since we've miscarried in the past, I have reasonable fears about losing our baby. Life outside the womb is viable at 25 weeks (with tons of support from a NICU), so I'm not quite as freaked about losing this little guy. Of course, he does belong to God and I realize that God can take him home whenever He wants. We definitely learned that lesson with the miscarriage. Children belong to God, He just lends them to us.Our next appointment is Friday. I'll only post if I have news to share.